I wanted to add some advice for women thinking about becoming a surrogate. Throughout this process I have learned a few things I feel are very important. First do not be in a hurry! If this is something you want to do, take your time, do your research and make sure you are happy with every decision you make! Do not settle or agree to something you are not comfortable with!
I think the most important thing I can not stress enough... Do not agree to transfer more embryos then you are willing to carry and no more embryos than the parents are willing to parent!
The last thing you would want to go through, is a reduction based solely on too many embryos stuck! A medical reduction is a different story and each surrogate and IP's have to be on the same page about that... but to reduce just because there are too many healthy babies growing would just be an awful expereince!
Make sure if throughout the matching process something is important to you, that you have it put in your contract!
If you have any reservations about the possible match you are trying to make... talk about them with the IP's if you can not agree and are not on the same page together... do NOT match! The right couple will come along, just do not be in a hurry and do not compromise the things that are important to you!
If you are using an agency, do not let them intimidate you into making a decision fast! Once you are carrying a baby or babies for someone else, you are connected to them at least through the whole pregnancy and if you are all not on the same page, it could be a uncomfortable and stressful pregnancy ... which no one wants!
I am sure I will come up with more info to share, but I wanted to get this out there now!
Tuesday, November 18, 2014
And the sex of the babies is... ;-)
Well our next ultrasound was scheduled for November 10th. The daddies were planning to be here for that as they are with most appointments.
But... Hubby and I really wanted to surprise them with the sex of the babies. It was something we knew they really wanted to know. They could not wait to put names to their babies instead of calling them Baby A and Baby B.
We were planning on traveling to their home for a long Halloween weekend. We were making a special trip out of it as they are in the north east and within a few hours drive from Salem MA, which is where we wanted to take our boys for Halloween. A very neat place for Halloween and lots of history for our boys to learn about while having a night they hopefully will not soon forget.
So in the midst of our planning... I got sneaky again ;-)
I called and talked with one of the wonderful midwives at our birthing center and asked if there was anyway at all to squeeze me in before we left to try and take a peak at the babies, after telling her our plans... they got me in early in the morning on our way out of town. Of course we knew there was no guarentee the little ones would be cooperative, but we were going to try. Low and behold, both babies had no problem letting us know if they were boys or girls right away. Everyone in the office was so excited, it was a great morning! We left the birthing center with almost an 11 hour drive ahead of us, plenty of time to figure out how we planned to surprise the daddies.
We arrived Wednesday evening, and knew both dads had to work on Thursday. So our plan was to check out a museum or two and shop and brain storm for a good way to surprise the dads! We took our boys to a great little museum where we spent most of the day and then headed to the local mall. We kept coming back to the idea of getting something special and engraving the babies names on them, as we already knew their baby name choices.
Finally came upon the store Things Remembered, I forgot how much I liked that store. There is not one anywhere close to where I live now. We decided we would get the dads each a gift and then the babies. We found these beautiful glass coffee mugs with silver plates on them. We had "Daddy" engraved on one and "Papa" engraved on the other. That is their choice for their children to call them to cut down on confusion of "two daddies". Then we saw two beautiful little silver rattles. We picked them out and had the babies names engraved on each end of the rattles. It was perfect!
So Thursday evening after a late dinner, we all sat at their dinning room table and told the guys we had some gifts for them. We gave them their first two boxes with the mugs. Each opened his perspective mug and they both loved them! Then we gave them the two smaller boxes and told them those were gifts for the babies, that we wanted to be the first to give the babies a gift. One daddy asked if they should wait till the babies were born to open the gifts... we laughed and said no way! Open them :-)
So each daddy had a box and was opening slowly waiting for the other to be at the same spot while unwrapping the presents... "Daddy" was holding his rattle and noticed a name printed on it... and said "I got a Helen"
"Papa" was still examining his rattle and was not quite sure yet what he even had in his hands. Daddy said to Papa... what did you get, he said I got a Thea, still looking to the other end of the rattle thinking we had put all four names on the rattles. Daddy jumped up from his seat "we got two girls?!" Papa was still figuring it out! LOL Both Dad's were beyond ecstatic !! Lots of hugs and tears of excitement!!
Hubby and I think we did a great thing with the surprise and it turned out perfect!
We had a great weekend together, Daddy and Papa even decided to make the drive with us to Salem for Halloween. All six of us dressed as skeletons, with my hubby painting two skeleton babies on my shirt.
We said good byes on sunday... and the following monday 8 days later, the daddies would be down to us for the next ultrasound appointment. Which of course was a great time and they were able to see their girls easy! :-)
I am feeling better these days, the world is not spinning anymore and most of the "morning sickness" is gone! woo hoo to that!! I still get tired easy and need to rest more so than I have ever in the past. Not too sure if it is my age or the fact of carrying two, or maybe a combination of both, but they do seem to tire me out easy! I lay down for 15-20 minutes a few times throughout the day and then I seem to be ready to go again. So far me and babies are doing very well! Almost 1/2 way done already! I was 18 weeks this past saturday (11/15/14) They say a twin pregnancy is full term at 37 weeks... so here is to hoping we make it to 37 weeks with no issues!
But... Hubby and I really wanted to surprise them with the sex of the babies. It was something we knew they really wanted to know. They could not wait to put names to their babies instead of calling them Baby A and Baby B.
We were planning on traveling to their home for a long Halloween weekend. We were making a special trip out of it as they are in the north east and within a few hours drive from Salem MA, which is where we wanted to take our boys for Halloween. A very neat place for Halloween and lots of history for our boys to learn about while having a night they hopefully will not soon forget.
So in the midst of our planning... I got sneaky again ;-)
I called and talked with one of the wonderful midwives at our birthing center and asked if there was anyway at all to squeeze me in before we left to try and take a peak at the babies, after telling her our plans... they got me in early in the morning on our way out of town. Of course we knew there was no guarentee the little ones would be cooperative, but we were going to try. Low and behold, both babies had no problem letting us know if they were boys or girls right away. Everyone in the office was so excited, it was a great morning! We left the birthing center with almost an 11 hour drive ahead of us, plenty of time to figure out how we planned to surprise the daddies.
We arrived Wednesday evening, and knew both dads had to work on Thursday. So our plan was to check out a museum or two and shop and brain storm for a good way to surprise the dads! We took our boys to a great little museum where we spent most of the day and then headed to the local mall. We kept coming back to the idea of getting something special and engraving the babies names on them, as we already knew their baby name choices.
Finally came upon the store Things Remembered, I forgot how much I liked that store. There is not one anywhere close to where I live now. We decided we would get the dads each a gift and then the babies. We found these beautiful glass coffee mugs with silver plates on them. We had "Daddy" engraved on one and "Papa" engraved on the other. That is their choice for their children to call them to cut down on confusion of "two daddies". Then we saw two beautiful little silver rattles. We picked them out and had the babies names engraved on each end of the rattles. It was perfect!
So Thursday evening after a late dinner, we all sat at their dinning room table and told the guys we had some gifts for them. We gave them their first two boxes with the mugs. Each opened his perspective mug and they both loved them! Then we gave them the two smaller boxes and told them those were gifts for the babies, that we wanted to be the first to give the babies a gift. One daddy asked if they should wait till the babies were born to open the gifts... we laughed and said no way! Open them :-)
So each daddy had a box and was opening slowly waiting for the other to be at the same spot while unwrapping the presents... "Daddy" was holding his rattle and noticed a name printed on it... and said "I got a Helen"
"Papa" was still examining his rattle and was not quite sure yet what he even had in his hands. Daddy said to Papa... what did you get, he said I got a Thea, still looking to the other end of the rattle thinking we had put all four names on the rattles. Daddy jumped up from his seat "we got two girls?!" Papa was still figuring it out! LOL Both Dad's were beyond ecstatic !! Lots of hugs and tears of excitement!!
Hubby and I think we did a great thing with the surprise and it turned out perfect!
We had a great weekend together, Daddy and Papa even decided to make the drive with us to Salem for Halloween. All six of us dressed as skeletons, with my hubby painting two skeleton babies on my shirt.
We said good byes on sunday... and the following monday 8 days later, the daddies would be down to us for the next ultrasound appointment. Which of course was a great time and they were able to see their girls easy! :-)
I am feeling better these days, the world is not spinning anymore and most of the "morning sickness" is gone! woo hoo to that!! I still get tired easy and need to rest more so than I have ever in the past. Not too sure if it is my age or the fact of carrying two, or maybe a combination of both, but they do seem to tire me out easy! I lay down for 15-20 minutes a few times throughout the day and then I seem to be ready to go again. So far me and babies are doing very well! Almost 1/2 way done already! I was 18 weeks this past saturday (11/15/14) They say a twin pregnancy is full term at 37 weeks... so here is to hoping we make it to 37 weeks with no issues!
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